1. Don’t introduce kids too soon
  2. Be sure that you’re up for the challenge
  3. Understand the package deal
  4. Plan, plan, plan, vs spontaneity
  5. Don’t make your partner choose between self-vs and kid
  6. Don’t force unrealistic labels on kids such as dad, mom, uncle aunt; Ms or Mr is okay
  7. Recognize that integrate into two family system is inevitable
  8. Be patient with the integration process
  9. Understand that kids will try to sabotage; don’t take it personally